Single? Available?

I recently spent time with a new friend of mine, her husband, and a few of their (male) friends. I was somewhat attracted to one of the friends and found myself searching for clues of his availability, or lack thereof.

The most obvious and absolute clue, the wedding ring, was not present. This being the case, I felt fairly confident that he was, at least, not married. There exists, however, a certain subset of men that do not wear their wedding bands, so “no ring“ does not necessarily correlate with “no wife.”

His phone rang five or six times over the course of the evening and during a couple of these phone conversations his tone of voice changed. There is something about the way a guy talks to a “significant” girl that is hard describe and yet clearly evident. I started to think that, yes, he must be attached.

And yet, he was blatantly flirting with me in front of his longtime friends. Further, no mention was made of him having a girlfriend and it seemed unlikely that she wouldn’t come up in conversation sometime during the course of the evening.

When I headed home, I was still uncertain. A part of me was hoping that the flirting may lead to something more.

I wish there was a way for a person’s relationship status to be undeniably clear. Perhaps we should walk around in t-shirts that broadcast, “Dating Exclusively, But Not Sure He’s the One” or “Happily Married, Back Away.” Perhaps I need to look at it differently and view the uncertainty of initial attraction (in all its forms) as an exciting part of single life.